Definitions:

Hardware is the part of the computer that you can kick.

Software is the part of the computer you would most often like to kick, but can't.

The idea that Bill Gates has appeared like a knight in shining armour to lead all customers out of a mire of technological chaos neatly ignores the fact that it was he, by peddling second-rate technology, who led them into it in the first place.
-Douglas Adams